Delight (Daily Encouragement)
the LORD reproves him whom he loves, as a Father the son whom he delights. – Proverbs 3:12
Yesterday we layed out a framework for parenting which calls us to delight, disciple and discipline children. The foundation, largest and most significant part is for children to know we love and delight in them – just as the foundation of the gospel is that God loves us and cherishes us. This excerpt from Scott Saul’s book “Jesus Outside the Lines” gives a beautiful picture of the significance of our children knowing we delight and love them:
Counselor and author Dan Allender says that to nurture a life-giving home environment, parents must be aware of two questions that their children are always subconsciously asking. All children ask both questions daily as they consider the freedoms and boundaries given to them by their parents. The first question is Do my parents love me? The second is Will my parents let me have whatever I want (more on this in two days)? Well-parented children know that the answer to the first question is always yes and the answer to the second question is always no.
From early on, Patti and I longed to create a secure home for our daughters in which they always knew they were loved. As Tim Keller likes to say, we determined to “catch them doing good” anytime we had the opportunity. We wanted our daughters to grow up feeling affirmed, valued and cherished as unique and amazing carriers of the image of God.
This longing for affirmation makes sense. Both existentially real and biblically true, it is the reason we Christians should be the most affirming people in the world. Rather than rushing to find fault, we should proactively seek opportunities to catch others doing good and to encourage – literally “put courage into” – others by verbalizing the way that we are “happy at them”.
How can you “catch your children doing good” and “put courage into them” each day so they know you delight in them?